So what kind of turtle is it?

30 Dec

Okay, one note on finding out the gender. This was always something I was fairly strongly against. I was all about the surprise, keeping it old school, buying gender neutral stuff, etc. It was kind of all bundled up with my former all-natural, no-interventions birth (and even conception) ideals.

But then infertility happened. And then this rather difficult pregnancy happened. And then we found out our child has a birth defect and suddenly everything we assumed about what this whole journey would be like, was different. We needed something to hang onto, something to make this real again. To bring it back to being about a baby coming into the world.

We needed to know Turtle’s gender to refocus ourselves and make this about more than the diagnosis.

One of the few benefits of being a high-risk OB patient (along with the frequent ultrasounds), is the possibility of finding out the sex early. We found out through a blood test called the MaterniT21, which tests for Down syndrome, trisomy 18 and trisomy 13 (all three were negative, thankfully). At our first appt with Dr. Kind, he recommended getting it, just to definitively rule out the possibility of any other genetic issues. It was the nurse who casually mentioned that the test also can tell you gender. So there we were at a little over 12 weeks, learning we’d be able to find out the gender in 7-11 days! We were pretty stoked (and shocked. Apparently, fetal cells float around in the bloodstream of the mother and can be detected as early as 10 weeks!).

So a week later, during my work day, I look down at my phone to see I have a missed call and a voicemail. I check the voicemail and it’s Dr. Kind’s office calling to tell me that the results of my MaterniT21 test are back and they are negative. She says nothing of the gender but to call with any questions. Of course I immediately excuse myself and call her back from the empty office space next door.

I have to admit, I was pretty certain Turtle was a girl. I had been having dreams of a daughter since long before we managed to conceive and a few since then too. My extreme morning sickness and the fact that I pretty much looked like shit also pointed to a girl. DH thought boy. No reason, just felt it. I expressed at one point that maybe what we both “thought” it was was really what we both just hoped it was.

Regardless. I get the nurse on the phone and she says immediately, “You want to know the sex?” “Um, yes!” “It’s a boy!” “Are you serious?!” I couldn’t believe it but was of course so, so happy. Suddenly, everything felt so so REAL. Im pregnant with a little boy. Our little boy, the fighter. I immediately called DH and told him. He just said, naturally, “I knew it.” He’s incredibly excited to be having a son though.

And at our second ultrasound with Dr. Kind, he was actually about to SHOW us Turtle’s boy bits! They were itty bitty of course but he assured us they would get bigger.

We kept this a secret until now because we wanted to surprise our families with the news at Christmas. I had thought of giving my parents and DH’s mom a small gift that would indicate a boy. I looked at some little blue turtle stuffed animals but they were kind of silly and didn’t feel right. Then I searched Etsy for “blue turtle” and found this set of three blue turtle ornaments. They are handmade and oh so pretty. And three was the perfect number, one for my parents, one for his mom, and one for us.

All the days leading up to Christmas it was killing us, keeping quiet. We had many gender conversations where we had to watch our pronouns very carefully. Earlier that night, my cousin was asking us if we were still planning an gender reveal party (I had wanted to do the thing with the colored cake, especially when we thought it was twins). I had to lie through my teeth and say “maybe,” when what I wanted to say was, “It’s actually tonight – in about 30 minutes!”

We gave them as the last present of the evening, “something special for the grandparents to be” and made sure they opened them together. They got the turtle reference right away but the gender part didn’t dawn on them until I said, “Notice anything about them?” My mom then said, “It’s a boy turtle?” And the room exploded and everyone was happy and we’re having a boy, ohmigod, the end.

photo-12

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21 Responses to “So what kind of turtle is it?”

  1. JustHeather December 30, 2012 at 12:14 pm #

    woohoo!! congrats on a boy turtle!! we love our little boy (and would have loved a little girl just the same).

  2. Theresa December 30, 2012 at 1:14 pm #

    Those ornaments are adorable! Yay for a little boy!

  3. B: JustcyclingAlong December 30, 2012 at 1:43 pm #

    Congratulations! The ornaments are adorable and a perfect way to reveal the gender!!

  4. Kate @ Infertile First Mom December 30, 2012 at 2:45 pm #

    Awww I love the handmade ornaments! And the way you did your gender reveal:) So exciting. Huge congrats on your little boy!

  5. talesofacautiousoptimist December 30, 2012 at 3:10 pm #

    I love the turtle ornaments! What a cute and adorable way to reveal the gender and have a very special ornament to hang on your tree every year to remember that moment! Congrats to you and your family!!! πŸ™‚

  6. Courtney December 30, 2012 at 3:30 pm #

    How fun! I love how you shared the news with your family!

    I was certain Matthew was a girl. So was B. When we did the big cake reveal, B was stunned. I already knew… I saw his boy bits accidentally in the ultrasound, and the baker told me when I picked up the cake. πŸ™‚ We both wanted a girl… And look at us now!

    I am excited for you! I always thought turtle was a boy. πŸ˜‰

  7. nonsequiturchica December 30, 2012 at 3:42 pm #

    Awww what a cute way to tell everyone! Congrats on having a BOY! πŸ™‚

  8. Cristy December 30, 2012 at 4:18 pm #

    Love!!!! Congratulations on having a boy!!

  9. cassiedash December 30, 2012 at 5:02 pm #

    Love the special way you delivered the news. Congrats!!!

  10. Lowfatlady December 30, 2012 at 5:12 pm #

    You made me tear up πŸ™‚ Congrats on your litte boy.

  11. Alicia December 30, 2012 at 5:17 pm #

    You are so cute! You made me laugh about the itty bitty parts getting bigger – hilarious. Congrats on the baby boy!!! So exciting!!!!

  12. Katie December 30, 2012 at 6:33 pm #

    Oh my gosh this made me cry! Love it!

  13. Lisa December 30, 2012 at 6:38 pm #

    Congrats on the baby boy! I am very biased, but I have to say there is nothing sweeter than the bond between mommy and son. A little mama’s boy! πŸ˜‰

  14. iamstacey December 30, 2012 at 11:26 pm #

    The ornaments are so cute! Congratulations!

  15. jjiraffe December 31, 2012 at 8:01 am #

    WooHoo! Congratulations!!!!!!!! Boys are awesome πŸ™‚

  16. cindysn December 31, 2012 at 12:37 pm #

    congrats!!!

  17. Joanna December 31, 2012 at 3:37 pm #

    Congratulations!! I love the way you told the family, that is so special! πŸ™‚

  18. Jenny December 31, 2012 at 5:19 pm #

    Congratulations on your boy turtle! I love the ornaments. What a perfect way to tell your parents. πŸ™‚

  19. ewagner123 January 2, 2013 at 5:28 pm #

    I just knew turtle was a BOY! Congrats. I’m having a boy too.

  20. Alissa January 4, 2013 at 11:27 am #

    Congratulations my dear. More boys to add to the mix! I am so happy for you!

  21. Amanda @ readingeachpage.blogspot.com January 4, 2013 at 10:28 pm #

    What a great gender reveal. Congratulations on the baby boy!

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